When the Olympic Race in London sets off at august 11th, it will be without my participation. Due to a broken rib, I’m not capable to give my best and therefore the Danish Cycling Federation decided, that letting me start, couldn’t be justified
In many ways I have to agree with their decision. Right now, I have trouble riding my mountainbike. I can only ride on the road, since every bump put a cutting pain into the damaged rib. If I had to stand on the start line in London, I wouldn’t feel fully prepared. It by far would be the scenary, I’d imagined or wished or that would make sense to me.
A couple of weeks before the last World Cup Race in Val d’Isère, I was training in France. Unfortunately I crashed during training. First I didn’t know, that my rib was in as bad shape, as it turned out, when I later got an examination by the doctor in Denmark.
In Val d’Isère I decided to train on the course, and see how it would go. I thought it was okay and the thought of not racing I’d put so far away, that it never really was an option. This is also the reason why I didn’t tell everybody, that I wasn’t on top. I didn’t wan’t anybody to say: “Don’t do the race” even though it would have made sense.
When the startgun went off, I soon realized, that I wasn’t really able to race. Still I wasn’t able to make the decision to pull out from the race, even though I was levels below my normal performance. I though, that any result would be better than no result and wanted to at least gain the few world ranking points, that still was within reach.
It is very hard not to be able to compete at the Olympic Games. I feel, that many people had put a lot of work into my going to the Games: The girls helping me collecting points for the qualification, sponsors designing new equipment and my team supporting me. When it all comes down to it, the Olympic Games should be my own dream. I’ve often felt, that people around me had greater wishes for me to go, than I had myself. I’ve often thought: “What is it about the Games, that’s so special? Isn’t is just a race, when it all comes down to it. Why is everybody putting such a big hype into it?” I’m fully aware, that my participation at the Olympic Games also has a great marketing value. Well, sometimes people around me forget to think about the complexity of my situation, even though they only wish the best for me.
I’m grateful for all the “get-well-soon-greetings” and “I really know how you must feel missing out on the Olympic Games”-comments. Well, after the first few days after the decision, I’m actually okay. I know, that physically, only time can heal. The greater challenge will be mentally getting back. In many ways, this tough situation right now is exactly what I need. It forces me to change my perspectives and ask myself the question, “why am I doing this, and what do I really want?” You sometimes forget, that my stellar season last year ( with two World Cup podium finishes and a world champion title ) isn’t the fruit of 10 or 15 years of hard and determined work with great support from family, friends and national team. When people have an opinion about me ( .. and believe me, – many have! ), they forget to see the whole picture, and I don’t blame them. Remember; I just started riding seriously around 2009. I still feel, that I just entered this world of mountainbiking and I don’t think many people end up with podium finishes in their only second World Cup season. No doubt about I’m blessed with a physic quite extraordinary. The feeling of riding on top of everything just feels like anything I know. It’s just the best feeling ever!.. And speaking of great feelings; my boyfriend just send me a youtube video, that quite well describes that hounded feeling!.. ( I just can’t stop laughing ! )